Every conversation counts

Last month Amy, Co-Founder of The Wellbeing Collective compiled our first newsletter for all the Consultants involved in the delivery of programmes to our many customers in 2017. In it she reminded us all of one of our key values:

‘Every conversation counts, so be courageous and compassionate’.

She was reflecting on the powerful micro conversations that we all have with each other and those we come into contact within every aspect of our lives. Throughout these conversations we nurture ‘sparks’ of insight and understanding.

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This week I’ve needed to draw on this inspiration during what was a rather tricky presentation. I had to deliver some difficult messages and I don’t always find this easy – my desire to please and leave everyone feeling positive often clouds my ability to be as direct and unwavering as I need to be. During the presentation I found myself trying to dampen down the message to placate the uneasy and emerging challenge in the room. During the rather fractious conversation that ensued I took a moment, whilst others were interacting, to take what I call a ‘purposeful pause’ – that is, a point where I stop and consciously consider my behaviour, my words and my interactions in the conversation. In this moment, in this space I created for myself, I reflected on the value of courageous and compassionate conversations and reminded myself that whilst I still had a difficult message to deliver – how compassionately I delivered it would make a whole heap of difference in terms of how people were left feeling. So that became my aim, my mantra for that meeting – “yes, this is a difficult message, but how can I help, what I can do, for you and with you, to move forward in a positive way”.

So many conversations provide ‘sparks’ of insight and understanding, but how we are left feeling after a conversation determines how we move forward with these ‘sparks’. At The Wellbeing Collective, we focus on ‘the best of what could be’, and genuinely believe that every problem or situation offers an opportunity. So that’s the challenge – the next time you’re having a tricky conversation:

  • PURPOSEFULLY PAUSE – give yourself a moment’s space to consider what is going on, to reflect on the conversation.
  • BE COURAGEOUS – remember to be clear on your message, you still have an important point to make.
  • BE COMPASSIONATE – think about how you can deliver your message in a way that is compassionate, hopeful, and offers the possibility and opportunity to focus on the ‘best of what can be’.

Author – Tim Coupland (Senior Consultant)  TWBC Consultants

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