I am sat here on my garden bench taking a short lunch break, sun shining, coffee in hand and reflecting on what I need to do this afternoon for work and this evening for home.
From almost no where find myself smiling in a moment of feeling properly happy, but as quickly as that feeling arrives it is overshadowed by a thought….. how can you feel Ok when its clearly just not ok for so many people right now?… people without gardens, exhausted key workers, overwhelmed NHS colleagues, the people feeling lonely and all those devastated by Covid 19.
In that second, the thought turns into a strong set of feelings; sadness, guilt and helplessness.
This is where I have a choice and deep down I know it…. I can….either…
Absorb those emotions, allow myself to be drowned by them and work extra hard without decent breaks or looking up at the sunshine…in order to make up for the fact that I am ok and my world is less difficult than others right now, believing that the only way to make amends is to make things harder for myself too….
Allow those emotions to sit with me momentarily, particularly the sense of empathy and then turn any feelings of guilt into gratitude for what I have and think about how I will make the most of that and turn the helplessness into focus, making my day useful, productive reflecting my own wellbeing needs and the needs of those around me.
It’s not every time that I choose wisely when I get flooded with harsh emotions… however I do seem to always have an endless number of opportunities to choose the right options and often I do.
Amy, The Wellbeing Collective